Beautiful Life

I told myself god has giving me this chances to learn and to see how human being act and behave yet I learn my lesson again.... never to trust, never to fall into that swirl of emotions. 

I always honest to myself, show sincerity, show passion and show love and my reward is pure friendship and pure understanding. At the end of 2013, I would really like to thanks to those had help me and those who never give me up ... I really appreciated every single effort they put on me, thru my worst and my greatest, I can only tell them I am surviving well and beautifully... I thanks to all... Just feel the love today and share it out to everyone 

Life is a moving forces

Just recently, I face another phrase of my life and I think it had thought me a great deal in life. I appreciate the lesson that person give and I really would like to thank him if I got any chances... Gosh, it really taught me about life and realistic and I really hit to the ground zero on this. But guess what, life goes on and I become stronger and tougher I think. 

I always believe life is a circle whereby things comes around goes around, but I also believe that sincerity would bring me to a more honesty group of people and with that I hold deep in me. Things happen with a cost so whatever happen in life enrich it and put it as a mark in the memory. There is a treasure box in every one heart, put everything in the chest lock it inside and it might be just another great piece of history in life. 

Sweet lies

"She was as naive as she is, angelic mind and living in her perfect little world. One day, someone come to knock on her door. She open the door and welcome in the man, the man charm her heart so much. For years, the door to her heart shut close so tight that not even Hercules can break it in. He manage to open her up easily, because she trust and she believe that this man is real with his word. But, came the day, when things start to appear and he started to change. Yet again, her world shatter down again."

Typical real life story of the love nowadays, is either gal been cheated by or man been cheated by. It is so hard to even imagine how people want to go break people hearts with intention. But, anyway, Gals and Boys... be tough, learn from the mistake and life is not that bad, believe in karma and what goes around comes around. 

Guilty as charge

"Loneliness is not a crime, unloved is not a sentence and insecurity is not a lifestyle." -- by me

Human being that survive till this centuries is getting more and more confuse about life and love. People start misuse of the word of love, trust and sincere. I guess we had gone too far in our time to even daring enough to step in front of our god and say I had live my life to the fullest, please grant me the passes to heaven. 

Neither heaven nor hell, would I want to be in because I am neither noble and angelic enough to qualify me to enter the hall of purity nor I am satanic enough to deserve the sentence from hell. I can only admit that I can try my very best to follow the basic principle of life in which not to cause harm to anyone even myself, not to cause destruction in life, not to.... there is so many 'not to' to even keep track on. 

I always ask myself, did I ever think of life in another way. What if? Or? Sometime I do have the imagination that 'what if I was born in the white house?' 'What if I was famous?' Question is always appear in my mind non stop but I try to answer one by one without even mess up (been trying my best). Eventually I end up with myself in the center of my life figuring out what had I been doing wrong. What am I searching for in life? Did I do my best? It is overwhelming how our reasoning can function, u don't need a degree of psychologist to even certify on this.

The one thing I can cherish in my life rite now is the loves and cares from those who really meant it. I am so appreciate with the sincerity, honesty and openness that these group of people had given to me, because apart from my own family they are the best support I look for and depended on. Strongly believe that no one is perfect in life and I do get on people nerves and piss off some people on and off, but that all happen unintentionally, and if you cannot say peace with me then sorry to say I don't keep hard feeling. My best defenses is just walk away and silence, most of time silence act as my defenses in order to protect my inner self from hurting so aggressively. No one would understand because the pain and the ache is so extreme sometime that I can't use word to explain.  Recently, something had happen in my life that taught me what is life and what is friendship, and yet the outcome I see more truthful friendship and more sincere feeling. There is always a loss and gain in this kind of situation, I might loss something but I had gain more, this is the kind of thing I keep on telling myself in order to get pass day by day. I believe get out from this situation would grant me peace in my life and would definitively grant me longer life. I really feel appreciated of this experience and it helps me so much and taught me so much that friendship is to cherish and not misuse, friendship is to be honor and not humiliated. Frankly speaking, if the path you walk is not suitable for me, I do have the right to turn left of right because we are all adult. Freedom in life and choices, maybe choice you make might make you happy but sorry to say that I don't want to be in apart of something that I am not comfortable.  

In short, I am as guilty as if you charge me as being clueless, ignorance, annoying, cold, what you name it but if you really value me and my friendship, face me off please would u?... I would be deeply appreciated if you can take that effort in knowing me more. 

Trying out, moving forward

I have not been in the dating scene for ages since my first relationship. I not sure why, but I think it teach me to grow and it helps to mature my thinking. Recently, I not sure what is the motive of my self conscious, I get myself sign up on a dating website. Guess out of the blue, I might just jump started something I think I should not. Anyway, I need to appreciate this sudden chances because it really educate me in what is going on in the love world nowadays, and it was a really a big eye opening for me. 

To me, I always believe everyone would have their deserve somebody at the end of the day. I guess that is just yet another naive idea of my, trying to tell myself "keep on going gal, someone special would be there waiting for u". At the end of the day, gone were the days of my youth. Actually I think I had indeed lock out myself after my first relationship, I lock myself with works and my inner self. Frankly speaking, it is not a good feel, try imagine a pool of your friend that might be in the same situation at that moment of time do encourage you to lock urself down, "who cares about man with big egos, lets just be women". Back then, alliance were form, groups were build, plans were makes and etc. But when love strike out of a sudden, everyone started to build up a new life and new pages, it seem the pool of the single ladies getting smaller and suddenly you were left alone in the borderless battle field, all alone. It was not a good feeling I guarantee you, all those happy faces, sweet smiles, all those marriage dinner you attend, all summaries up and u end up with "u are so sucks in your life". No offences, unless u are so comfy and confident enuf that u would not end up like a sitting duck in the pot roast and you are so happy in your life, go ahead and I solute you.

Being one of the warrior myself for the past few years, I was thinking I need to do some adjustment in life. Imagine this, when weekends were usually fill up with plans, luncheon, dinner and activities which does not trigger the needs of man and all of the sudden you end up with just yourself alone, hanging out with books, listening to music and sitting in front of the laptop, a write up of your life in a sentence. Sometime I shy away from going out with couples, not sure why but always there is an aching feel inside that there is no word to describe of and it is so sad and depressing sometime. I mean friends cares and love you so much that they want to share the happiness with you but it always that feel that make the whole thing weird, and then suddenly I try to avoid group outing and stuff like that. A typical life of a single women in real life nowadays.

All that make you thinking, your mind start rolling and your finger unintentionally punching the word "dating" keyword on Google search. In the period of punching the alphabet in and waiting, my self conscious mind start interfering: with all the fraud cases, all the lies and etc. Being a gemini person, this is the conversation between the angelic (A) and satanic (S) me:

A: What are you doing?S: Doing something that I suppose to do ages ago. Why u care? Online dating.A: Don't you read on the newspaper, all those fraud cases, all those nasty story. Try to have faith on yourself. Believe.S: There is no harm in trying, loosen up and try to grow up. U aren't doing criminal stuff? Just try out, not a single sens involvement.A: What if?S: What if? I thought you always say live the life to the fullest and why not try this out, are you happy with yourself and your pitiful life? Get a life and be wild sometime, u not young you knowA: U got some point, but.....S: Listen to me once and we would have the conversation again in future.

It was a hard war and argument to be in and then the list of website start popping up and I end up signing up on it. A brief write up, a short introduction, putting some major detail of myself and current situation, I still have some hesitation of putting my photo but end up the satanic of me put the photo anyway. Things happen so much and fast that I don't even realize, message and email of friendship offering, man with all ages and all kind, you name it and they are there. I not sure of the time frame/centuries that I am in but I realize how backward I am in, gosh. Man are really good in words sometime it freaks me out, and I not sure is this an act or nature born. No wonder gals can fall so easily. Anyway, those that interest me I started off with sincerity and start chatting and exchange words in the email. At least, no psychical and mental connected is easier to call off I think, I prefer to play magic of disappearing sometime.  As things start rolling, invitation for coffee and drinks start pouring in, I not really like to entertaining on this request but guess what all of sudden I indeed entertain one. For the very first time, I went out for coffee with a total stranger that I don't know much of... guess that would be another chapter in my life that I can write on...

Resident Evil: Retribution

Is wonderful Saturday, been emptying myself most of the time figuring out how to arrange my time and start packing. 

After picking up my friend from the airport, I ask a simple question: "do you want to watch a movie". Without any doubt, for sure my friends say why not. Actually I wanted to watch "The Possession" because I am a horror freak... I love horror movie....
I think I will miss out this movie but I will try to catch back my horror movie collection.

The Possession, 2012

But unfortunately, he say lets watch "Resident Evil: Retribution", the movie just out in Malaysia recently, and I did follow this movie series and was excited what is the upcoming story. 

Resident Evil: Retribution, 2012 

The movie started off with the rewind of the previous story whereby they were on the deck of the ship. Personally, the movie is1 hour 45 min of action movie and gun fighting. As usual, Saturday  is a movie time for youngster and couple, so guess what it was pack with people and we manage to buy the ticket in time to watch it early. I not sure why but this time around, the movie loss it attractiveness and I don't feel the wow effect anymore. Just wondering would it be my expectation of this movie is too high or simply I looking for more action effect.

Naruko 爱慕可

Been searching for a series of skin care with a middle range price but with the best of quality care for my skin. I have try out biotherm and kose but none of the above can satisfy my skin, I guess different skin have different requirement and nutrition. Let me explain my skin condition.    

Before I went abroad to further my study in State, my skin condition is just like normal combination skin, fair and not much of acne. At the younger age, I don't have much knowledge on upkeep my skin. I only know facial wash, toner and moisturizer. As I age, my skin becoming dull and dry, acne and other problem. At first, I adjust my diet, reduce my stress and lead a heavy life (even try to drink herbal medicine) but at the end I realize I need 3rd party intervention. I have studies lots of brand and have try few of it in order to save my beauty. Finally, I found this brand with good price and good quality, founded by Mr Niuer from Taiwan, who has been the figure in the skin care industry for long time. I heard about this brand from Taiwan and always wonder when can it reach Malaysia, so I decided to bought it from Singapore when I first time saw it. And, finally it reach Malaysia after 1 year.  I was happy and will keep on trying the various product that this brand offer. 

The first product that I bought under this brand is while having holiday in Singapore, it was on a display shell in the Watson outlet. From the range of choices, I choose the pair of raw Job's Tears lotion and toner. I had been using it till the last drop and it had create a very good 

The smell is near to barlie, very refreshing.

The lotion is as milky as silk not sticky feel

Sleeping mask, I like this so much and it create a shield on my face
at nite.

This is the second sleeping mask I bought under the same brand, not really like it  but
still very useful to create a shield.

Please visit this website for further information: http://www.naruko.my/shop/